Looking Back on 2008

Hey, everybody! Can you believe it’s already the end of December? Soon we will be ushering in 2009!

It’s been an insane year, not only for me but the entire LGBT community. In this year alone, in some places same-sex couples have gained or regained the right to marry, only to lose it again. The next year will bring the California Supreme Court decision regarding Prop 8, and gay-rights activists are on pins and needles waiting for a decison. The election year brought about many wins for liberal Americans; however gays and lesbians were dealt blows at almost every turn. Gay marriage bans passed in Arizona, California, and Florida. Alabama passed a ballot measure to deny gays the right to adopt. We were knocked down, but we are slowly catching our breath and getting back up, ready to fight the discrimination we’ve been given. President-elect Barack Obama has promised to end “don’t ask, don’t tell” so gays and lesbians can freely serve their country in the military. His views on gay rights are admittedly sketchy, but much better than McCain’s. With a Democratic majority in both houses of Congress, perhaps we can reach some victories for the LGBT community.

My own year has been eventful. In March, I finally overcame my own fears and came out, proving to be the single most pivotal point of my life so far. I was amazed by the overwhelming acceptance of my family, friends, and peers; I did not expect such a large and deep acknowledgment. I have had to handle homophobia and discrimination, but I’ve done so quite well. My newfound self esteem allowed me to create this blog in an effort to help others in my situation.

In August, I began my senior year of high school and my second year at my job at the local public library. Both have provided exciting new challenges for me.

Fall also brought luck to my love life. After a short, online relationship with my (technically) first official boyfriend, I embarked on a relationship with my current boyfriend, Dakota. I often joke that he has the second greatest boyfriend in the world (and I have the first greatest), and I mean it. He’s a loving, intelligent young man and super-cute to top it off. I’m so lucky. It’ll be two months in January, and the greatest two months of my life at that. I wasn’t really looking to fall in love, but damn if I haven’t.

I'm so ready for 2009. I’m looking forward to Prom with Dakota, graduation, college, and whatever life throws my way. I’m at a point in my life where I’ve evolved immensely in a short time. I feel invincible! I can handle anything that I must face! I implore you to evolve your life in the next year (I’ve stopped now, so why not keep going?). I personally want to make this site bigger and better, and reach more people! Good luck with all your endeavors, and have a great holiday, no matter which one you celebrate!

Day Without a Gay-The Protest

Hey, everybody! I’m gonna go ahead and cut to the chase, folks: it’s time for some activism!

On Wednesday, December 10, is a nation-wide protest against Proposition 8. This protest, called Day Without A Gay, is an attempt to show the nation the impact the gay community has on the economy, society, and other aspects of life by excluding ourselves from society for a day. LGBTs are encouraged to call into work “gay” and not make any purchases as to stimulate the economy. Instead, they are encouraged to volunteer with gay-rights programs. I’m very excited to participate. I’ve taken off from work and plan a silent protest in school that day. Hopefully I can find an opportunity to volunteer my time instead of work.

I was a little wary about this effort at first. After all, for me to just skip school would have such little impact, not to mention the fact that missing school would seriously be a bad idea with finals and the school I’ve missed so far. So, I decided I would do my own little thing and come to school anyway.

This is my goal: I will attend school as usual. However, I will be completely rainbowed-out. I mean head to toe. I’ll do it a lot like Day of Silence: I will not speak or communicate with my teachers or peers in any way. My only form of communication will be a slip of paper that explains my silence so I won’t get in (as much) trouble. I think I’ll be alone on this (unlike last year during Day of Silence when I had others participating) but I don’t care. It will be tough, but I can handle it. I am anticipating some resistance from our administration, but that’s nothing I can’t handle.

Hopefully, I can get the literature (information cards explaining the day) on the site before Wednesday so you all can use it. I’ll be doing those either tonight or tomorrow. I also have to make a shirt and gather my other supplies.

If you are interested in participating within your school, I have a few tips to make your protest successful:
1. Make sure your apparel is within the school dress code. If it’s not, it’s an easy way for your administration to shut you down without infringing your rights.
2. The point of a silent protest is so it doesn’t create a “distraction”. That’s another way administrations stop protests.
3. If you can get some friends to help, that’s always a plus. There is strength in numbers. If you can’t find anyone, at least find someone to defend you if a peer or teacher antagonizes you.
4. Don’t use this as an excuse to not do school work. Part of the point of doing a protest in this form is being able to be at school and complete schoolwork. That is the only thing you should be doing unless the circumstances require otherwise.

Hopefully, this will be a success. It’s the first year this has been done. For more information, visit www.daywithoutagay.com. It gives details on how to successfully protest (they don’t explain my methods, but there’s other helpful hints) and list different volunteer opportunities in your area. GOOD LUCK!

The Importance of Sex Ed

Warning: the following post contains a frank, tactful discussion of sexual topics. If you are offended by such topics, feel free to not read it. You have been warned, so I don’t want to hear any complaining about that aspect.

Today at lunch, we were discussing relationships and my relationship with Dakota came up. One girl, who isn’t homophobic at all by the way, was totally confused by the concept of anal sex, not understanding how it works and why anyone would do it. She didn’t get how it wasn’t necessarily painful and why even same-sex couples needed to use condoms. I tried to explain as best as possible without instigating the imminent giggling and awkwardness that come with such discussions. I was not very successful. Finally, I gave up and told her she should ask her health teacher. She seemed wary to do so, but the conversation was over.

It took me back to my days as a freshman sitting in PE during the health unit. As I remember, we only spent a few weeks on sex education, occupying the rest of the time with other aspects of health. I strained to remember the lessons I learned in class (I had also learned about sex from other sources, and it all sort of melded together). The only constant in my thoughts was that I really didn’t learn much from my teacher. The only lesson I really remember is calculating the cost to have a baby. Contraception was barely mentioned, and what I thought would be a very important subject, masturbation, was completely non-existent. Basically, I had no truly practical knowledge of sex, heterosexual or homosexual. I had no idea how to use a condom, or anything that I would have to use as I became sexually active. It wasn’t like the class was abstinence only, but vague teaching made any experience impossible to gain.

I’ve always been frustrated by the state of sex education in our nation. All too much, teens like my peers and I have to turn to other sources to learn about intercourse. This is very dangerous, and can lead to hazardous online interaction, pornography addictions, and unrealistic or false expectations. As a gay teen, I was particularly frustrated. Let’s not pretend: teenagers have sex. They need education they can use, not a PG blanket education that does not prepare them for real life. If they teach abstinence, they need to teach alternatives to sex. They should teach the importance of using protection for gay and straight couples alike.

Conservative types often argue that such teachings would increase sexual activity in teens. However, I personally believe it’s worth the risk as compared to leaving it as a mysterious entity to be discovered without any knowledge. If parents don’t like that their kids are being taught frank sexual advice, then they should teach their child. Frankly, most are too lazy and just want to complain. It’s these types that I wish would’ve definitely learned to use contraception, because they shouldn’t be parents if they don’t care enough to handle their child’s development through puberty, which are very treacherous years for everyone.

My point is to deliver this message to the teenagers themselves: demand a true education. Don’t just sit in class as your head fills with dozens of questions that never get answered. It might be embarrassing, but isn’t that embarrassment better than the shame of a child or an STD? Take charge, my peers. Until adults get their act together, it is up to you to handle it. Be wary of other sources, as they can lead you down the wrong path (the internet and religious sources are poor sources).
Above all, don’t become sexually active unless you are prepared emotionally and mentally. That’s the best protection.

A Tribute to Britney Spears

Hey everybody! Sorry I haven’t posted in awhile. I’ve been really sick. I had viral gastroenteritis, and I’ve missed some school and work. I think I’m still getting over it but for the most part I’m better.

Not a lot has been going on for me otherwise. Missing school has taken its toll for sure. I don’t know how long it will take me to make everything up, but I’m in it for the long haul. I’ve been busy getting ready for Christmas and trying to find some cheap gifts for all my friends. I have to buy my senior pictures soon so I’m a little strapped for cash. Of course, I’m also buying my tickets for the Britney Spears concert on April 2nd, 2009 at the Sprint Center in Kansas City, Missouri. I CAN’T WAIT!!!! My friend Lyndsay, Dakota, and I will be in the crowd cheering on our favorite pop idol. Actually, Circus came out yesterday and since I ordered the deluxe edition off of Amazon, it won’t be in until later today (yeah, I totally sprung for one-day shipping). When I get home, it’ll probably be waiting for me. NO SLEEP TONIGHT!

I haven’t always been a huge Britney fan. However in the past two years I’ve started to listen to her music and can officially say I’m an addict. She swiftly became my favorite musician and I idolize the pop princess. If you had the pleasure of catching her documentary that recently premiered on MTV, you can see that Britney is just another lonely soul in the game of life. It might seem trite, but it made me cry. Even a fan as great as myself was expecting some sort of boo-hoo pity party, but they asked the tough questions. It was deep. I was blown away.

I've defended my girl throughout the crazy times. After all, she is a human being and deserves to be treated like one. My peers teased me for this, but it didn’t matter. Hell, I’m an outsider the way it is. I relate.

I’m so excited for Britney. I hope she can get her life back on track. And for those of you who say she’s a talentless whore, I beg to differ. Would we be talking about her after a decade long career if she did not have some bit of star quality? She’s edgier, provocative, and always on our minds. Good luck, Britney. This post is dedicated to you!

Don’t forget: you can listen to Circus with the playlist on the side bar of my site for free. But don’t settle for that! Go to Itunes and download it or go out and buy the CD. It’s so worth it!